“I wish you could see you the way I see you.” 5 minutes later, my friend echoed that same phrase back to me. Why can’t we see our own greatness? Why do many of us feel like we don’t belong or are a fraud? In this article, we’ll discuss the psychological phenomenon known as imposter syndrome and how to overcome imposter syndrome and boost your confidence.
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What’s imposter syndrome?
Imposter syndrome is a phenomenon in which high-achieving individuals have persistent self-doubt and fear of being exposed as a fraud despite their accomplishments and objective success. Often people with imposter syndrome attribute any success they have as being due to luck or help from others. They also attribute setbacks as part of their inadequacy.
What causes imposter syndrome?
Here are some of the causes of imposter syndrome.
Change
Change can cause imposter syndrome because you are expected to do or be different from what you are used to. For example, you may change jobs or schools, pulling you out of your comfort zone. As a result, you may feel like you do not belong or that you are not capable or inadequate. Mixing a lack of experience in your new situation with a strong desire to succeed can be a perfect mix to feel like an imposter. It’s important to remember that this is normal, and most people aren’t comfortable in new situations. However, with time, you will learn, grow, and become more comfortable.
Personality
Certain personality types are more likely to feel like an imposter than others. For example, if you are a perfectionist, it’s not surprising that you’ll feel uncomfortable in a situation where you aren’t perceived as “perfect.” One way to battle against perfectionism is to get comfortable with the feeling of being uncomfortable and not being perfect. You can do this by exposing yourself to experiences in low-stake scenarios where you know you won’t be perfect. For example, you can try to learn a new skill or hobby. Try to develop a growth mindset and learn to take yourself less seriously.
Book recommendation:
Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck
How to overcome imposter syndrome
Wondering how to overcome imposter syndrome? Here are 23 hacks to try to overcome feeling like a fraud.
1. Stop comparing yourself to others
No one is born perfect. We all have to learn and grow over time. If you feel like an imposter, maybe that’s just a sign that you’re moving outside of your comfort zone and hanging out with people that are better than you. That’s a good thing! Remember, just because they’re farther along in their journey doesn’t mean you’re a fraud. Moving past your comfort zone and being around people more skilled than you is the best way to learn, grow, and build confidence over time.
2. Remember, we all have a negativity bias
We all have a negativity bias which is when we “attend to, learn from, and use negative information far more than positive information.” This is a protection mechanism. Try to consciously remember positive things people have said or things you have done to counteract this bias.
3. Have a growth mindset
In the book, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol Dweck talks about having a growth mindset, which is a mindset where people believe that their most basic abilities can be developed through learning, dedication, and hard work. This is the opposite of a fixed mindset, where people believe their abilities are fixed. Work to develop a growth mindset. With this mindset, if you lack confidence, you’ll feel better knowing you can improve.
4. Ask yourself better questions
You may feel like an imposter because you’re asking yourself questions like, “Do I belong here?”. Instead, try to ask better questions like “What can I bring to this situation?” or “How can I add value?”
Book recommendation:
Change Your Questions Change Your Life by Marilee Adams
5. Stop focusing on yourself
Often we feel like an imposter because we’re in our heads and thinking about ourselves. We think, “What will they do when they find out I’m a fraud?” Instead, think about other people and who you can help and serve by being where you are. For example, “What can I learn from this situation and share with others?” or “How can I use my experience to uplift others?”
6. Get curious
You think, “I’m a fraud,” or I’m an imposter,” but where is that coming from? Give yourself time to reflect and get to the root of your negative self-talk. For example, do you have a core belief that successful people look or act a certain way that’s different from how you look or act? Maybe you have a core belief that you aren’t worthy of love or success unless you’re perfect (did your parents set high expectations of you as a child?). If that’s the case, it’s time to revisit and rewrite those core beliefs into something more useful to you.
7. Find evidence to prove your negative self-talk wrong
Our thoughts don’t always reflect reality. So if you have a negative thought, work to find evidence from your own life to prove your negative self-talk wrong. For example, if you think, “I’m not supposed to be here,” you can counteract that thought by finding evidence from your past where you thought something similar but, over time, proved your worth and added value because you were meant to be there.
8. Ask for feedback
Feeling like an imposter? Discuss this with a trusted mentor and ask them for feedback. More likely than not, they’ll offer positive feedback and give you positive reinforcement to help you understand that you’re valued and belong where you are.
9. Savor your success
High achievers are great at moving on when they achieve major accomplishments. Take a moment when you achieve something and really savor it. You worked hard; you earned this. Take time to be grateful for what you accomplished and bask in the positive emotion of achieving something.
10. Keep a swipe file of your successes
As stated before, we have a negativity bias, so it’s easy to dwell on our mistakes and what we’ve done wrong in the past. To counteract this, keep a swipe file of your successes. This can include notes and journal entries of what you’ve accomplished in your life. You can also include thank you cards, positive feedback, and positive reviews from other people about your work.
11. Keep learning
Sometimes we lack confidence because we don’t know as much as we feel we should. One way to boost your confidence is to keep learning and growing your skills in the area where you feel like an imposter.
Learn more:
12. Be honest
It’s humanly impossible to know everything. If you ever get caught in a situation where you are unsure, it’s ok, and you can be honest about that. It develops trust when you are honest with people about what you are unsure of instead of lying to them. You can always say, “I’m not sure; let me get back to you on that.”
13. Get in a positive mental state
Imposter syndrome has been linked to burnout, anxiety, and depression. One way to counteract these is to get into a positive mental state. For example, try taking a walk outside, listening to upbeat music, talking to an optimistic friend, watching an inspiring video, or doing something you enjoy.
Learn more:
14. Have a rebellious attitude
Having imposter syndrome is normal. Consider taking on a rebellious attitude and consciously choosing to banish that feeling once and for all. Challenge yourself to do what you can’t. Remember, everything we experience and think is represented in our minds as information. We can choose to control this information and decide what our lives will be like.
Book recommendation:
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Manson
15. Read autobiographies
When you read autobiographies, you get into the minds of some of the most famous and successful people in history. The more you read, the more you’ll understand that they’re more like you than you realize, and they, too, struggled with failure, setbacks, and imposter syndrome.
Book recommendation:
Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover
16. Stop thinking so much
One way to stop thinking about being an imposter is to stop thinking altogether. While that sounds easier said than done, you can calm your mental chatter with meditation and deep breathing exercises. Over time, you’ll be better able to quiet your mind and shift limiting thoughts to be more constructive and positive.
17. Find people that cheer you on
We don’t call babies learning to walk “imposters”; we hold their hands and offer encouraging words. Find people that will hold your hand and cheer you on when you’re “toddling” around in a new area of your life. Over time your skills will increase, and so too will your confidence.
18. Just start
Nobody has a perfect first draft. However, starting is the only way to improve, so take action and embrace failure. Confidence comes from experience. Experience comes from starting.
Learn more:
- Side Hustle Ideas: Over 200 Ways to Make Money on the Side
- Gold City Ventures Course: E-Printables Side Hustle Course Review
19. Do your best
If you believe you’re an imposter, you may hold back, thinking, “Why try? I don’t belong here.” Unfortunately, thoughts like this could become a self-fulfilling prophecy. So instead, whether you believe you belong or not, always try to do your best. If you’re doing your best, chances are you’ll prove to other people and yourself that you do, in fact, belong in the position you are in.
20. Be present
Often imposter syndrome comes with a lot of negative self-talk and mental chatter about what happened in the past and what could happen in the future. For example, you might think, “when they see my work next week, they’ll know I’m a fraud, and I’ll get fired.” One way to counteract this negative chatter and thoughts about the past or future is to focus on the present. For example, you can use deep breathing techniques and focus on the moment. Rather than pondering what could happen, think about your current situation and how you can add value.
🔥Hot tip: Get a free trial of Headspace to help calm your mind and be more present.
21. Be kind
Often we judge others, and we judge ourselves even more. To encourage less self-judgment, try to be more kind and accepting of others.
22. Understand that you’re not alone
People that have accomplished amazing things in their life still have imposter syndrome. Here’s proof:
The first problem of any kind of even limited success is the unshakable conviction that you are getting away with something, and that any moment now they will discover you.
Neil Gaiman
I have written 11 books, but each time I think, ‘uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.
Maya Angelou
I still sometimes feel like a loser kid in high school and I just have to pick myself up and tell myself that I’m a superstar every morning so that I can get through this day and be for my fans what they need for me to be.
Lady Gaga
I still think people will find out that I’m really not very talented. I’m really not very good. It’s all been a big sham.
Michelle Pfeifer
Now when I receive recognition for my acting, I feel incredibly uncomfortable. I tend to turn in on myself. I feel like an imposter.
Emma Watson
Sometimes I wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot, and I think, I can’t do this. I’m a fraud.
Kate Winslett
23. Get inspired
Now that you know you’re not alone in feeling inadequate from time to time, here are some inspiring quotes that you can read to boost your confidence and inspire you to keep taking action.
Here is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
Carter Crocker
You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.
Mahatma Ghandi
Believe in your infinite potential. Your only limitations are those you set upon yourself.
Roy T. Bennett
The bottom line
Imposter syndrome is common, but just because you think something doesn’t mean it’s true or that is has to hold you back. Use the techniques above, and work to increase your confidence. Some studies have shown imposter syndrome decreases with age, so that’s one thing you can look forward to!
Frequently Asked Questions about How to Overcome Imposter Syndrome
Here are some of the most frequently asked questions about how to overcome imposter syndrome.
How to overcome imposter syndrome at work
Finding an experienced mentor can be the best way to overcome imposter syndrome at work. A mentor can help you understand how they felt when they were in your shoes, and they can give you honest feedback and encouragement when you need it.
Does imposter syndrome go away?
It’s possible for imposter syndrome to go away, but the data is inconclusive on whether or not it goes away with age or on its own. If you really want your imposter syndrome to go away, the best thing you can do is to work on yourself and even consider getting professional help.
